Returning home
by FlourGirl21
Summary: Katniss leaves everything and one behind, even the boy she loves. now ten years she's returning home, to make amends. what or who will be waiting for her and will they be able to forgive her. AU. no hunger games. Everlark eventually. Romance/ Angst/ Hurt/ Comfort. disclaimer; i don't own anything.
1. Chapter 1

**Big AU no hunger games. Eventually Everlark.**

**Disclaimer; I own nothing.**

**Prologue.**

Greenville, north-east America. A smallish town only about 1500 people living there on the edge of the lake. Loggers most of them, it was an amazing place to grow up, friends, family I had it all. It was here in this remote place hat I meet the love of my life, Peeta Mellark, son of the new baker that moved here. We meet at age 6, becoming best friends, growing up together my relationship with him grew. We started dating at age 12, we where each others first kiss, first love. My family approved of him, my dad, mother, little sister prim (they could have pass for siblings), my older brother Gale. Our family got on great and they weren't surprised when we told them we where dating. We went through everything together, school, high school and where planning on going to college together, all of us. Peeta to get his business degree, so he could eventually take the bakery over, his other brothers not wanting the trouble but would still help from time to time and me to get my degree in outside wildlife and parks. I always love the outdoors, the forest and wildlife, hunting from when I was a little girl, my dad teaching me when he was home. Him being a logger driver, transporting the logs from here to where the wood factory was.

Everything was planned out but life has a way of throwing a wrench in the way. That wrench was the death of my father, killed while at work driving. Another trucker, he fell asleep driving the opposite way to dad, head-on collision. He died immediately and my lie fell apart. My daddy gone from the world, I shut down slipping into a deep depression, never talking to anyone, going on autopilot. My mother, sister, brother all tried to snap me out of it but it was Peeta that over the years brought me back. The only problem was I hated him for it, at least before I was numb to the pain but now I felt everything, everything reminded me of him and the time I spent with him and made future plans but that was time I would never have. I realised soon that it wasn't Peeta I hated, no never him but this place and I had to leave, find something else to do with my life.

That brings me to now, standing in-front of everyone telling them what I've done.

"Katniss you've got to be fucking joking, right." Gale asks, him long-time girlfriend, Johanna standing next to him. My mother, Prim, Annie, clove, Peeta and uncle Haymitch all there too. Peeta having tear in his eye's.

"I'm not lying or joking. I joined the marines, I leave tomorrow for basic training at Portland, then I sign up for my first four years. There is no changing my mind." as I finish Peeta stands from the table and moves past us all, heading out the front door me close behind him.

"Peeta! Wait!" as I shout this, both standing on the porch, the rain pouring down.

"Katniss, why?" I finally look at him, his blue eye's piercing my steel one's.

"I can't stay here Peeta, everything reminds me of my dad and I hate it. I want to leave all the pain behind and I want you to come with me." he looks at me wide-eyed.

"W- what! I can't! I can't just leave everything, what the hell am I supposed to do there Katniss?" he yells at me, the rain soaking him.

"I don't know! Find a job, stay with me." I snap at him.

"Then what, you leave for five years to get shot at, I can't do that. I can't sit by a phone waiting to get a call to tell me your coming home, that your injured, worse that your dead. I won't be able to survive one month let alone 5 fucking years!" he yells back anger burning in his eye's. Peeta has never been angry with me, something about this first time raises my blood to boiling point.

"I thought you loved me Peeta! What is it you say "always" well where is it now!" this shocks him, taking a step back as though I've punched him in the gut.

"Don't you dare question my love for you!" he snaps. "you know I damn well love you, I'd die for you and do anything to take the pain away but this, this is too much Katniss. My life is here, my job, my friends, my family, my love. It's all here."

"yeah well your love isn't going to be here tomorrow!" I retort, anger laced through my words. "Listen Peeta, if you truly love me, you'll leave all this and be at the airport bag ready. If not then I guess we'll be done and I'll be going alone." with that I leave Peeta speechless outside in the rain, slamming the door behind me, ignoring the shocked looks everyone's giving me and heading to bed.

I'm standing at the airport terminal, the morning spent listening to people try to talk me out of this. Nothing worked, I'm going and that's that. I'm waiting, Peeta's not here and there's only 10 minutes left.

"Katniss, honey please don't go, I'm begging." I ignore my mother, tired of her pleas. After 10 minutes my times up and they call boarding. I stand getting hugs, tears and pleas from all but I ignore them. Uncle Haymitch the last to speak to me, he hasn't said anything yet.

"You going to cry to old man? Try to talk me out of it?" he looks at me and then gives me a tight hug.

"Make sure you think girl... about everything." one finally squeeze and he releases me. Turning and walking away but not before stopping to tell me something. "Stay alive girl." then he's gone.

I turn, picking my bag and moving, prim speaks up.

"What about Peeta?" she questions.

"he made his choice... fuck him. He can stay here forever, I'm going. Tell him not to come crawling back to me." the anger overtaking my words, my brain. He couldn't even be bothered to show up. With that I leave, boarding the plane and heading off to Portland, aged 18 to join the marines. I never let the tears slip, I held onto them.

10 years later.

"lieutenant Everdeen, here's your discharge papers and flight, one way to Greenville." the officer hands me my papers. I sigh taken them, Gale. That asshole just had to go and get me to come back, he's marrying Johanna and he demanded that I be there. I'd been planning a while now to quit the marines, for my reasons. I had two tours under my belt, 8 years serving aboard, two years rest somewhere in-between, basic training and other training included in that, now I was going home. Back to Greenville and my dandelion, the only boy I've ever loved or thought about, the boy who I crushed 10 years ago. No one would talk about him, I wouldn't ask either but now on the plane heading home, the ten-year old tears rolling down my face, I can't stop thinking about him.

Peeta I'm coming home.

**A/N;So there's the first chapter, just something i couldn't get out of my head. hope you enjoy, the time spent in the marines will be shown in flashbacks. it's a modern setting but with my own twists, i may use modern-day things (places and locations) but there'll be a capitol and 12 districts, other countries will feature and the main enemy of this story will be Coin. All will be revealed in later chapters.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the reviews glad your liking it. Review and tell me what you think of this chapter.**

**Chapter 1**

**Flashback**

"Everdeen, your up. 10 minutes." I sit, first phone call after being deployed. Some backward country, desert for miles, only thing the eye's can see. Bloody hell to get out of boots. The base I'm staying on, camp Anderson, advance, much like the bases back in America. Christ even our own shower stalls, which Is one good thing, training showed was that there are some fucked up people who get in. also Peeta is the only one to get to see me naked...

Damn, stop it Everdeen. I mentally scold myself, Peeta made his choice it wasn't you.

Yeah but you where a bitch to lay this on him one day before. My mind retorts. I've had these thoughts since a week after leaving him but I'm too big a coward to do anything about it, even back then the letters between me and my family, no one mentioned Peeta, I didn't ask. To stubborn.

The screen beeps three times, then an image of Prim and Gale appear on-screen, all of us screaming at each other, lunching into conversation about my deployment, training and location. Friends I've made, Finnick being the main one and part of the squad I'm in, 451 snipers. Both of us the best in the squad, the new rifles exclude the need for a spotter, the advance scope and design give all the readings needed. Prim, near the end of my time brings up the Mellarks but at first mention I end the call, telling them I need to go. The five times after that, they try but I don't listen and they stop mention it.

Finnick knows of my troubles, know I see no interest in any other man, he's like a bigger brother, protective and caring of me, we help each other. Finnick is a playboy, had many girlfriends but never a long time one, that's his wish to find someone he can spend his life with. I wish I had that, my brain kicks in again.

You did, you left it behind.

No he left me. I try to argue but I know it's wrong and so does my brain.

Riiiiiiiight, let me know when you actually believe that.

**End of flashback.**

The plane lands, 230pm. Jet-lagged, not something I'll ever get used to, gathering my bags and making my way through the familiar terminal. I see primrose, no logger a small little girl but a beautiful young woman, flowing blonde hair, big beautiful blue eye's. Next to her Gale, tall, lean, muscular, hint of a beard growing and next to him, his arm around her, her holding tightly around his waist Johanna. A small bump visible beneath her shirt, the summer in full swing. They see me, not hard to miss in my camo trousers and green tank top.

"KATNISS!" prim sees me, running full speed and launching herself into me, almost knocking me to the ground.

"Gees Prim, nice welcome back." I laugh, pushing her back and looking at her fully. "When the hell did you grow into the beautiful woman standing in-front of me." she blushes, mumblings thanks. Gale and Johanna coming up behind her.

"Katniss." Gale says, pulling me into a big bear hug. "I'm glad your back." I hug back, inhaling his scent, still the same, pine, grass, the forest smell. Part of home. Johanna next, I look at her, she was one of Peeta's best friends and we never talked after I left.

"Hello Katniss. It's good to see you." she says giving me a small hug.

"You too Johanna, your glowing." I tell her because she is, the pregnancy seems to have soften her up. Walking back to the car I can't help think about Peeta, the fact he's not here. It's been ten years can he still hate me after all that time. My brain retorts the answer I know.

you'd hate him if he disappeared and left you for ten years. I sigh, might as well get it over.

In the car driving I ask.

"have any of you seen Peeta?"

"errr... there was a message from his brother but... but I don't think you should hear it." Prim tells me, worry and sadness laced through her words, the faces of the other two showing the same.

"No... I... I need to hear it, please." I ask, I need to know where I stand. Prim sighs, fishing her phone out her pocket and handing it to me.

"first voice mail." prim tells me. I open the phone and select the first one playing it on speaker.

"Primrose it's Rye. I'll tell you this once and only once, Wheat agrees with me. Keep that fucking bitch away from our family. Peeta doesn't and won't know she's back, he's got enough to deal with. She made her choice long ago, she can fucking live with it. Anything happening from know on you text me or Wheat and let us know if she'll be there. She doesn't get a redo, another change, nothing understand me nothing. She's not allowed in the bakery or on the grounds, even if she's with you guys. Keep her away." the message ends, I feel all the tears rolling down my face, Prim reaching around the chair and hugging me, Gale gripping my hand and giving it a reassuring squeeze, Johanna just gives me a sympathetic smile. Where driving alone when I start to think. Peeta was in the wrong too, he should have given it a chance, he should have fought more harder. Now with anger running through me, the message replaying in my mind I want to meet him face to face.

Gale take me to the bakery, now" I tell him

"Kat that isn't a good idea."

"I've been shot at, I think I can handle two pissed of brothers." I tell him

"it's not that which I don't think you'll handle" I'm about to ask what he means but he takes a sharp left, driving down the road to the bakery.

The bakery stands there. Just like it did all those years ago, the red bricks standing out against the wooden buildings next to it. The blue sign above the bakery, yellow writing on the sign, Mellarks it says. I leap out of the car and start towards the bakery but some-things not right I can feel it. The door burst open, two large men come out standing on the porch, one more coming up behind them, I can just make out whats being said.

"Leave it boys, it's not worth it." Mr Mellark says, only realising the two men in-front of him are his sons. Raymond, Rye for short and Wheaton shortened to Wheat. They're both big men but they used to be like brothers and maybe me explaining my point of view can sort this, bring something good out of it, at least make them help me talk to Peeta. I start to walk forward, the two brothers coming this way. In a fist fight with these two I know, even with my training one solid punch from them and I'd be out, completely.

We reach each other half way, the two standing between me and the bakery, fire in their sky blue eye's, Mr Mellark behind them looking worried. Behind me, Gale, Prim and Johanna.

"What the fuck is she doing here." rye hiss at us.

"I'm here to see Peeta."

"Over my dead body."

"easily done."

"Hmm, not going to happen whore, fuck off back to your group fuck."

"Raymond!" Mr Mellark shouts.

"What you think she didn't, you think she has the right to see him or her." I punch him in the eye but it does little than make him stagger, the size of him keeping him up.

"That's not for you to decide, it's Peeta's choice-" Mr Mellark starts, cut of by Wheat.

"No it's not, you weren't the one to see him, to live with him back then, I almost fucking lost it seeing him like that, he's the best of us and she nearly kill him, he'll never be the same but that girl in there has brought him back to as close as we can get and I'm not letting her or her fucking evil get anywhere near them. Do you know how long he tried to get a hold of you, how many letters her sent, phone calls, all unanswered. It took him nearly 5 fucking years to move on and even then he only thought about you, until her. He's lost too much, gone through more than anyone should in one life time and when it boils down to the bottom of it, it's your fault." Wheat finishes, who the fuck are they talking about, Peeta said he'd stay with me forever, I know I hurt him and left but he never broke his promise to me, never.

"Who the fuck is this girl!" I demand.

"None of your fucking business" Rye snaps at me, just as I'm about to retort an abusive response the bakery door opens.

"Dad I'm taking Sophia over to Delly's house i'll-" he stops as he see me, eye's looking with mine and the little girl, no more than 1 or 2 in his arms stops squirming and it hits me. Peeta Mellark has a daughter and she's not mine.

Livid, it's the only words to describe what I'm feeling, how dare he do this, what happened to forever, I start stalking my way over to him, ignoring the brothers in front of me, when a hand on my shoulder stops me, I'm spun around. My face is burning, I've just been slapped, hard, very hard. Mrs Mellark stands in-front of me, kind Mrs Mellark, she's never raised a hand to anyone, never punished her kids for anything, they may have had a strong taking to but never did she hit anyone, always better with her words. I look at her, eye's wide open in shock. She looks calm as she walks over to Peeta, everyone else rooted to the ground the same facial expression that I have, they're wearing it too.

I can hear her clearly as she speaks to Peeta, calm and caring she places a hand on his cheek braking his stare.

"Peeta, listen everything is going to be fine, take your daughter over to Delly's house, I'll come for you later. Ok" he nods and his mother kisses his cheek then his daughters before walking him to the car and waving good-bye as they start down the road. As soon as they're out of sight her steel, hard gaze returns, anger burning deeply in her eye's. She walks back over to me and again, slaps me hard on the other cheek, both now matching.

"What the hell do you think you're doing here girl." she spits at me, all the fight having left me. " what did you come back to gloat at how broken you left him, at how you're doing so much better, at how you've moved on to other men." she says, basically repeating what Rye and Wheat have said, I'm a whore in her eye's.

"i... I... I came back to see Peeta." I try weakly. Mrs Mellark sneers in my face a growl coming out too.

"Well you've seen him and his daughter. Now leave and don't come near my family again, you've caused enough damage to last more than ten life times." she tells me and my anger returns, why is it all my fault.

"Why! Peeta left me, he made his choice, I at least kept my promise and stayed faithful to him, never went and fucked a random whore and got myself landed with a bastard child." Rye looks ready to explode. I hear Prim and Gale explode and Johanna shout my name. Rye walks right up to me and grabs my arms.

"Don't ever speak about Madge that way again, understand," with that he roughly shoves me away and the Mellarks walk back to the bakery, Gale pulling me back to the car and placing me in the back next to prim. I just sit there I silence, think over everything.

It wasn't my fault. I tell myself.

Yup, still not convinced up here. My brain replies.

That's where I am now, at home just finished eating dinner and telling mother and uncle Haymitch what happened. They too have the shocked look on their face and I want an answer to a question.

"Why the hell didn't anyone tell me about this?" I demand, Prim the only one to speak or even look at me.

"We did Katniss, we all tried to tell you, Peeta too himself but after so long getting ignored, he..."

"He what?" I ask. "Come on Prim, you're the only one to actually tell me anything, so speak." she looks uneasy and to my surprise it's Haymitch that speaks.

"He tried to end it sweetheart." my eye's bug out of my head.

"W... w... What?" I asked, shocked and unbelieving.

"You wouldn't answer him at all, he was ready you know, couple months after you left he was ready to move but no address, the military telling him you blocked all information from them to him, you cut all ties with the boy and he lost it. Fell into a deep depression and took a lot of sleep syrup, was in a coma for 6 months, we all tried to talk to you but you wouldn't have any of it. Then no info for a long time, the next we know your over sea and we tried again but still you wouldn't hear it." Haymitch pours himself another drink of alcohol, taking a sip before continuing. "the boy lasted three and a half to nearly five years before his family and yours to some degree convinced him to move on. That's when he met Madge." I look at them anger burning in my eye's.

"So you people helped him move on to some shank?" I shout, unable to believe this, taking another drink from the glass I have.

Haymitch looks at me, knocking the glass out of my hand. "Quit your fucking bawling, I told you when you left to think about everything, not just yourself. As his brother said you fucked up and left, telling him it was over."

"i gave him a chance-" I try to yell but Haymitch cuts me off.

"The fuck you did, you gave him 12 hours to decide, 12 fucking hours for him to pack up and leave his friends and family, his life. What the fuck did you think would happen. He was a wreck after that, shut down completely, wouldn't talk or eat, go out or anything. Everyone got shit worried that he'd kill himself, he almost did! Then Madge came, pulled him back from the abyss, gave him hope that something could be good again. He still fucking loved you but he had to let you go, you didn't answer nor respond to any messages he left. So tell me sweetheart, what the fuck did you think would happen, ten years and the boy would wait for a girl that everyone and I mean everyone thought hated his fucking life. He moved on found an amazing girl, one that life saw fit to bless them with a child, a beautiful girl, then be sick and cruel and torture him all over again by taking Madge away. I've always thought this and you fucking proved it. You could live a million life times and never deserve that boy. So you'll need to forgive me when I feel no sympathy for you or your fucking feelings." with that he throws the glass at the wall stomping away from everyone, no one speaking but I can tell they all agree and that makes the hurt so much worse.

I don't say anything, neither does anyone else, I just stand and head back to my bedroom, closing the door and falling onto the bed, ten years worth of tears begin to fall, Peeta having a child was my dream, my life and I've fucked it all up.

Just before I fall into the darkness my brain kicks in.

Finally figured it out, you fucked up by leaving him and look where that got you. It tells me.

I know.

Good, so what you going to do, sit and moan about it, move on or do the right thing and try to get him back. We both know, so don't even try to lie about it. With that my brain shuts down and I fall asleep. Tomorrow I'll start trying to get my Peeta back but I need to know what happened in those ten years, all of it.

**A/N: so I know at the moment Katniss sounds really bitchy and whinny but she also knows she fucked up but like classic Katniss she doesn't really want to believe that, but her brain knows. Everyone feels angry towards her but it'll start to change, slowly as she makes amends, gaining people's trust again. There'll be problems along the way, we all know that Katniss can do stupid things when not thinking, but it won't be anything to major or maybe it will have really thought about it, got two ideas for that part of my story, I'll see which one fits more with the overall story line. Next chapter we'll learn what happened in the ten years that Katniss wasn't around, find out about old friends and Madge of course, Finnick will show up at some point and we'll learn more about Katniss's time overseas. Katniss and Peeta will meet again for the first time, properly, alone and no one to stand in their way, she'll also meet his daughter, so until next time see yah. Also i made Peeta's mother better, not abusive and she's the one Peeta gets his golden tongue from.**


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